Will all the procrastinators please raise your hands? I'd hate to feel like I'm in this alone.
Once again, I find myself in one of those unproductive energy cycles. You know what I'm talking about: those times in life where you really just want to curl up in a fetal position and stay there until something better comes along? Where you will do almost anything to avoid doing the one thing you're really supposed to be doing, including but not limited to: making paper airplanes or rubber band balls, calling your great-aunt Tessie who is stone deaf and can't remember who you are anyway, and cleaning behind the toilet?
I'm in that mode again. This isn't the first time I've procrastinated and it surely won't be the last. I get like this sometimes. There's no pattern to it, nothing in particular I can blame point to as "the reason" why I just want to be lazy or avoid doing something. So it really doesn't matter WHY it is. It just IS. I've learned to accept it along with adopting a "this too shall pass" philosophy about it. I've come to believe it's just a natural part of being creative and sometimes a bit driven: you keep going and going like the Energizer Bunny but eventually your battery runs out of steam and you slow down or stop, until you get a chance to recharge.
The problem is that I tend to hit the wall, so to speak, at precisely the moment when someone is expecting something from me. Like the client who is waiting for the piece she hired me to write. It's not a big job, and this is someone I've worked with before so it's not as stressful as working with someone for the first time. But I'm stalling for time as it is... and I still haven't even started writing it. Same thing with my damn taxes. I know I have to get it done by the 17th, or face the wrath of the IRS (can you say "government-sanctioned TERRORISM"?), but have I even started sorting receipts? Nope.
I wonder if there is a 12-step program for procrastinators. "Hello, my name is Lisa, and I'm a Procrastinator." Sometimes my procrastination comes when I'm super busy... and sometimes it comes when I'm not busy enough. In fact, I think I tend to procrastinate the most when I don't have as much riding on my shoulders; I work at my best, most of the time, when I'm working to a deadline. So it's kind of ironic that I'm most likely to drag my heels when I'm under the least amount of overall pressure.
Can women even get performance anxiety? Men have Viagra for theirs... but what do we women have to pump us up and get us back in the game when OUR particular type of performance anxiety shows its ugly face? Our version of performance anxiety isn't sexual; I think it comes along when we're feeling overloaded or just overwhelmed about our lives in general. After all, we're supposed to be experts at taking on more than we can handle, right? But we're only human, and there comes a point for everyone where we just need to stop and back off a bit, before we can move forward again. So, sad to say, the pharma industry has yet to invent that magic little pill to MOTIVATE us when were just not feeling motivated.
Hey, wait a minute... what a cool idea! Maybe THAT's the pill that should be the next blockbuster drug. We could call it "Motiv-Aid". One pill a day and you forget all about the lame excuses, the being in denial, and all the tricks and tactics you use to avoid doing things. Instead, you'd wake up and just WANT to be productive, all day long. Not mindlessly productive, but you'd take care of what you need to do without stressing about it or whining about it or trying to manipulate someone else into doing it for you.
Think about it: Kids would make their beds and pick up their toys without being told. Husbands would take out the trash and give the kids a bath without their wives having to threaten to withhold sex. Bosses would no longer have to use fear and intimidation to get their employees to do their jobs.
And maybe if all those things were happening on their own, without the women having to nag someone to do it or do it themselves, then we women wouldn't feel we had to take on everyone else's job in life just so things would get accomplished. And we wouldn't have to procrastinate or "hit the wall" before slowing down and taking a much-needed break.
Ah... what a wonderful world it would be.
