Big news! (I mean, other than surpassing the half-million visitor mark yesterday!)
Although we're finalizing a few important details, I wanted to put the word out now that our lovely 1-bedroom Apartment in Montmartre will be available for rental starting this spring! It will definitely be available beginning April 1, 2012, but there is the possibility it could be available during the latter part of March as well.
I'll have the complete web site for the apartment ready for viewing within the next 48 hours (in English but a French translation will follow shortly), but in the meantime if you know you are planning a visit to Paris and would be interested in being among our very first guests, please don't wait to contact me ASAP via this email address: ApartInMontmartre@gmail.com. In your email, please list your travel dates, your contact information, and best times to contact you. First come, first serve!
And to refresh your memory, there are some photos of the apartment here as well as a partial description (scroll down, it's a long post).
I'm so excited! Even though this now adds another big pile of "stuff to do" on the list of everything else I've got going on, this is something we've been working towards and it's so great to see it about to take off.
It's official! There have been a HALF MILLION visitors to The Bold SoulTM blog since February 25, 2005!
That completely blows my mind, to be honest. A half a million... can I even count that high? Well, maybe not in French.
Whether you've been with me since the beginning or you just got here today, whether your best friend told you to check out my blog or you stumbled upon it while searching for something or other... I'm grateful and humbled by your interest and participation over the years. After all, is a writer still a writer if no one is out there to read what she's written?
So here's to the past 7 years and 500,000+ bold souls, to someday soon hitting that 1 MILLION mark (wow!) -- and to the next 7 years, and to more bold adventures in all our lives. Merci mille fois, and cheers, mes amis!
OK, I don't often do a double-take while passing shop windows, but this gorgeous red purse (although it's also very nice in the charcoal) stopped me in my tracks and had me nearly drooling on the window at Lancel today. Just the other day I was saying to Georges that while I don't really care about designer labels and clothing, I DO like pretty and unusual bags (remember my Jane Austen book purse?).
Isn't it scrumptious?
I wasn't always such a handbag afficionado, but in recent years they have captured more of my attention. I think the lure of handbags (or shoulder bags, totes, clutches, you get the idea) is that they ALWAYS fit even when your jeans don't, they can almost be an art form, and if you take care of them they will last a lifetime. Sure, I still buy cheap, crappy purses in a pinch, but more and more, I'm finding that I prefer to save up and get something really special. I doubt I'll ever be someone who can wear the latest fashion trends in clothing, but a purse is one size fits all. And every woman deserves to have something that makes her feel special and fabulous, so why not a purse?
Of course when I mentioned my fascination with purses to Georges, he asked if I wanted to buy the 10,000 euro Gucci bag we spotted in Venice last May, and I had to laugh because if I had 10 grand to spare, I sure wouldn't blow it on a purse!
So sweetie, if you're reading this, this is absolutely NOT a hint to go and buy me this red bag. Because although it doesn't cost 10,000€, at 869€ euros it's still ridiculously expensive.
However if you ever happen to see a nice fake Lancel bag just like this being sold on a street corner somewhere for about 25 euros, I wouldn't say no. ☺
Hey, can I bounce something off you folks for a moment? And it won't even require a survey.
Recently I have been approached by a couple of different parties who are expressing interest in running paid advertising (they call it "paid guest editorials" but we know what THAT means) on my blog.
I am in NO way interested in allowing people to do guest posts that are clearly biased (especially when selling products or services I wouldn't use or endorse myself), no matter how much they might offer to pay me (but believe me, these folks weren't offering much).
However, this DOES raise the general issue of paid advertising on blogs: How do you feel about that? I've watched over the years as a few very prominant bloggers have been able to turn their blogs into a paying venture, the most notable (for me, anyway) being the very successful Heather Armstrong at Dooce.com. In the beginning, she took a lot of flack from her readers for her decision to go with an ad-based design model -- but as it turns out, it was a very good move in her case, as she gets at least a million visitors per month and as a result her blog attracted big-name advertisers like HP, Walmart and Sears, among others. It got so successful that she and her husband were able to turn her blog into a full-time family business that allowed her husband to quit his job to co-manage the business, and now they both get to work from home while raising their two daughters. I think it's fantastic, I hope it lasts for them, and frankly I wish they'd start teaching a class so the rest of us bloggers can learn from their experiences!
When Heather started getting a lot of negative responses from some of her readers, I was a bit surprised. I mean, it didn't bother me one iota that there would now be banner ads and sidebar ads on her blog; it didn't detract at all from her quality writing and excellent photography. I figured I didn't have to click on an ad if I wasn't interested, and more power to Heather if she could find a way to make some honest money with her blog. Yet some readers questioned Heather's ability to remain objective if she was accepting paid ads, particularly when, in the past couple of years, she has been able to leverage the popularity of her blog to get some projects "sponsored" by major corporate advertisers -- like when a telecomm carrier helped them set up the technology in their new home office and Heather had to write blog posts about the project while including discreet "sponsored by Blah-Blah-Blah" in the actual articles.
Now, I can see how there might be the potential for a blogger to feel the need to suck up to her advertisers, especially if, as in Heather's case, the advertisers in question are putting up some serious money (how else could they have afforded to buy a bigger house?) But I've always admired the way Heather and Jon have found what I think is an appropriate balance with how they present the ads on the screen as well as how they handle these periodic "sponsorship" opportunities. This is tricky stuff, and I think they've done quite well. I can't help but wonder if those who object to the advertising are simply jealous of the blogger's ability to turn a buck or two from their writing? Or do they have a valid point about the potential loss of credibility and integrity?
Let me just state that I don't feel I am in any position, at the moment, to accept paid advertising on this blog, and I wouldn't even go down that path unless I could figure out a way to do it without it becoming a full-time job. I have nothing like a million visitors a month (hell, I have yet to break 10,000 in a single month, though I once hit 9,996). So this is not something that is imminent on this blog.
Still... I couldn't help but wonder, what would the reaction of my readers be, if and when I DID decide to turn my blog into a profitable writing venture? I mean, a few years back, I tried setting up a simple PayPal donation button on my blog as an experiment, and while a few of you were incredibly generous (thank you!), for the most part it brought in no significant extra money... all it did was generate complaints from people who felt I had a hell of a nerve asking my readers to fund my writing!
So... what do you think? Should successful bloggers pursue the opportunity to turn a profit from their blogs by accepting paid advertising, paid "guest editorials" or sponsorship? Or is that "selling out", in your opinion? Whichever way you're leaning on this, feel free to elaborate about why.
Consider this as market research on my part. Thanks!
FINAL UPDATE: OK, we've reached our maximum of 100 responses to the survey! Thanks to everyone who joined in, your feedback is extremely valuable to us. Once I have had a chance to analyze the date, I'll share some of it with you here because I'm sure some of you are curious how everyone responded. Again - thanks! And I look forward to also being able to fully share what our [now NOT so] secret project is all about.
*******
I need your help, blog peeps. Would you please take 7 minutes (or less) out of your day and answer the 7 questions in this short, and totally anonymous (I don't even ask for your mother's maiden name or your cup size), survey?
[Sorry, survey now closed!]
It's really important to me that I get as many responses as possible, and quickly, so I can figure out a few things.
And it has nothing -- absolutely NOTHING, I tell you, who started such a monstrous rumor!? -- to do with the secretproject Georges and I have been working on. If anyone says otherwise, I will be forced into a non-denial denial. (That's what happens in an election year, right?)
So, after more than 5 1/2 years of blogging, I finally figured out how to add a blog search feature to this blog! You'll find it over there on the right, in the sidebar.
Type in one or more search terms and Typepad will provide you with every blog post AND every comment on any blog post that contains that search string. If you type in more than one word without double quotes, you'll get posts with either/or or all terms. To restrict the search to exactly the terms you want, put them in double quotes. Once you get your results, they'll be sorted by "Best Match" but you can change the sort order to "Most Recent" at the top of the results to put them in date order.
Try it now: type "turkish toilet" (it's not case-sensitive) and see what you get.
The Bold Soul™ is this week's Featured Link on the Europe for Visitors site. Check it out, looks like they have some wonderful resources for anyone planning a trip to Europe.
So, okay, 2010 wasn't the best year, prosperity-wise, for a lot of people. (Nor was the year before and the year before THAT, come to think of it.) But prosperity CAN be yours; it's not just for other people, and when I say "prosperity" I mean an abundance of things in addition to financial prosperity.
Where do you want to be more prosperous? Do you want to create more love, fun, good health, new adventures, or work you really love?
My good friend and coach, Laura B. Fortgang, might just have the plan you need to help you have a truly prosperous life. Check out "The Prosperity Plan" at www.TheProsperityPlan.net and pick up a copy of the book at Amazon or a bookseller near you (FYI it's not big and it's an easy read, so NO EXCUSES about not having the time!) It's also available on Kindle!
Remember, if you want things to BE different, you may have to DO different things. Laura's got THE PLAN... the rest is up to you.
I decided to start a daily photo blog project for 2011, since I'm taking more photos on the fly these days with my iPhone, and it's over here at Tumblr.com if you want to follow along:
I'll still be posting photos here, of course, and most likely on Facebook and Twitter for those that follow me there, but I'll try my best to post a variety of images in case you're following me in more than one place.
So, on the eve of my 400,000th visitor (waving happily at you, whoever you are!), I took a long-overdue peek at my visitor stats to see what's what, and to get my usual chuckle at some of the keywords people are typing in that somehow lead them HERE.
And as always, the biggest draw is variations on a theme: "Is he into me?" It continues to bring in a fair percentage of new visitors after directing them to this page (although I have now written several posts on the subject, since it keeps coming up).
When I say "variations", I am not kidding. Check out the current list, where apparently slight differences in punctuation, spelling or phrasing "count" in search engine lingo:
Is he into me
Is he into me?
Is he into me or not
signs he's not into me
signs he is not into me
how do I know if he's into me
how into me is he
he's not into me [I'm sensing a pattern here, aren't you?]
why is he not into me
how do I know if he's not that into me
how do I know if hes into me
how do I know he is into me
hes not into me
why isn't he into me?
why did he break up with me out of nowhere saying he's not into me
signs he's not that into me
signs hes not into me
signs he's just not into me
signs he's into me
signs he adores you [and thank you for using another word besides "into"]
mixed signals in dating
major signs that he is not into me [oh, like minor signs aren't enough for you?]
is he that into me
is he really into me
is he not calling because I intimidate him?
is he not "into" me?
is he just not that into me
is he into me over the phone [huh? Over the PHONE? What about in real life?]
is he into me or not I can't decide
is he dating someone else
I thought he was into me now he barely speaks to me
how to read a guys mixed signals
how to know if he is really into his girlfriend [uh, and you're asking because you're sleeping with him on the side and you want to know whether he's going to dump HER and come running to YOU? Puh-leez]
how do I know if he's into me like I am him
he's not contacting me
he's not calling me
dating mixed signals
clues he's not into you
if I'm on line looking for "is he into me" then he's not [I think you just answered your own query]
So, I'll say it again, ladies:
If you have to ask, then NO, he is not into you. If he IS into you, you will not have a single doubt about it. He'll let you know through his actions (not only his words). He WILL call. He WILL want to spend time with you -- lots of it. He won't be sleeping with anyone else, because he'll be totally hot for YOU. There ARE no mixed signals.
The guys who SEEMED to be into you, and then disappeared? Maybe they were into you... for that moment in time, however long it was. But they weren't into you ENOUGH to go the distance. That's all.
And that isn't your fault. If he isn't into you, nothing you do or say will really make a difference. You can't MAKE him be into you.
So if you're with someone or chasing after someone who's not really all that into you (and come on, if we're being totally honest here, you know deep down what the truth is about that, don't you?) then instead of asking "Is he into me?", maybe what you SHOULD be asking is: "Why am *I* into a guy who is not into me?"
You're so much better than that. So cut your losses and move on. There are worse things than being single... like giving up your self-respect by wasting time on a man who isn't worth it. Go! Live your life. Be fabulous. Have fun. Do things you enjoy. Stop waiting for Mr. Perfect, and just get out there and live it up!
And one of these days, when you least expect it, the guy who IS totally into you will cross your path, and you won't have to wonder about it any more.
A certain American ex-pat blogger (who shall remain nameless) has a certain Apple-worshiping (and très beau) French husband (who shall also remain nameless) who told her the following anecdote this morning, nearly causing said blogger to snort coffee out of her nose.
French husband was having lunch with his colleagues. They were debating the merits of the new iPad versus the iPod Touch. French husband bought an iPad while on a recent trip to Canada, so he was pretty much the first kid on the office block to have the new toy and it is the talk of the water cooler. Most colleagues have been suitably impressed.
One colleague, however, said that he didn't see the point of the iPad, really; he thought it was just a bigger version of the iPod Touch. So he figured, what's the point? What's so great or different about this iPad thingie, other than it being bigger?
French husband pauses, thinks, and then replies:
"That is like saying that all bites* are the same. Sure, the basic functionality of all bites are roughly the same, but in practical application, une petite bite is not quite the same as une grosse bite. "
Momentary silence from the colleagues as they reflect on this wisdom. Then, the skeptic had no choice to agree with such irrefutable logic on the part of the French husband. Because what man will argue with the "bigger is better" theory?
Now... does anyone want to take a guess at how many of these guys will be flashing their own shiny new iPads in the coming weeks?
* Une bite (pronounced "beet") = a penis. And why the French word for penis is a FEMININE noun, and the French for vagina is a MASCULINE noun, is a whole other issue entirely.
If you're in Paris: a French friend of ours is seeking an Anglophone nanny for her 2 little boys starting September. NOT a live-in position. Boys are 7 and 3 and the youngest starts maternelle this year, so it's for after school 4 days per week plus Wednesdays. I know the boys very well and they're adorable, awesome kids; the mother is half French and half Canadian, speaks English, and wants the boys to become more bilingual. Family lives in the 18th, near metro line 4/Marcadet or line 12/Jules Joffrin. A student looking for a part-time job would be perfect.
Interested parties can email me at lthwriter@gmail.com and I'll put them in touch with my friend.
So we're all moved in and everything went really well. We had a busy and exhausting week getting out of the old house and into the new, unpacking as much as possible to clear space and make the home functional. We've admired our great view(s) again and again. We even hung a few curtains, replaced the toilet seat and shower head, and opened some cartons of toys and books. Oh, and Georges got the new giant 27" iMac up and running. All in all, we've made big progress and everyone seems to be happy (if tired) and feel good being in the new space. Now, it's Monday morning, the three "men" of the house have gone off to work/school and it's just me here, home alone. Which means: time for some BLOGGING!
I was catching up on reading some of my favorite blogs when I came across something interesting on Dooce.com's "Community" feature, which was a discussion of what "Girl Skills" we feel we lack but wish we had. In reading some of the other responses, some of the more popular wish-list items were knowing how to put on make-up, being able to walk in high heels, being better at styling our hair, or choosing flattering clothes. Some wished they knew how to be or even WANTED to be a mother; some felt bad that they couldn't have a baby. A fair number wished they knew how to be flirty, sexy, a "girlie girl". And a few rare souls felt they had most of the girl skills down pat already: they prefer dresses to jeans, can apply eyeliner like a pro, and could teach a course in flirting.
Here's what I added:
For the past 3 years, I've been an American living in Paris. It's
hard to be an overweight, clumsy, frumpy American living among so many
thin, put-together, always-perfectly-made-up, confident French women.
Seriously - even new mothers with tiny babies are thin and have their
hair and make-up done, and they don't wear sweats to the store. They
look FABULOUS, even in jeans and a sweater.
I also wish I knew how to flirt better; even though I'm now very
happily married, it took me until I was 45 to finally find the right
guy, and I think part of that was lacking confidence in being around
men. I was always the "best friend" rather than the "object of desire".
It might have been nice to feel more confident about myself around men
when I was younger and still single. The French women seem to have an
edge here, too. French men and women flirt freely... even in the
workplace. And no one gets fired or sued for it, either.
What's YOUR take on your girly skills? I find this subject fascinating, because of course we women all have our own ideas about what it means to be female and feminine. For me (just to expand a bit on the above), when I was younger, I did used to be comfortable walking in high heels, but I can no longer wear them since breaking my ankle in the late 90's (NOT while wearing heels, BTW), and I used to be a great dancer whenever I went out to clubs. I started playing around with make-up as a teenager, and in my early 20's even had a job working a cosmetics counter at Macy's where I sometimes did free make-up for customers, so I could do the makeup part.
But for me, I think where I have always felt the most at a disadvantage was in the flirting/dealing with men in a romantic sense department. I didn't grow up with brothers, and had next to no contact with my father after the age of 12 or 13, so boys were alien beings to me. I never knew how to act around boys if I actually LIKED one of them. I never knew how to flirt, or even how to just be myself, so I found myself saying and doing a lot of really stupid things to get attention from boys. I had fun hanging out with the boys in my social group at school, and learned how to be friends with boys, but lacked the feminine "wiles" to know how to go from "buddy" to "babe" in their eyes. I had this one really good friend growing up, and she was a natural when it came to flirting and "getting" boyfriends; they just seemed drawn to her, which on the one hand fascinated me and on the other hand left me feeling woefully inadequate as I questioned why boys didn't like ME the way they seemed to like HER.
As I evolved into my 30's, fortunately I became less obsessed with what other people thought about me. I became more self-aware and understood that it just isn't in my nature to enjoy playing games with people; I'm too direct and straightforward to be comfortable with some of the flirting-type of games men and women play with one another. I became more satisfied being ME, and found that I could take pride in the things I WAS good at while letting go of the need to be someone I wasn't.
In my 40's, I really hit my stride -- call me a late bloomer, I guess -- and finally "got it right" when it came to men. Or should I say, MAN... THE Man. I never had to do or be anything other than who I am, naturally, to attract him. I never had to play games. He already thinks I'm sexy and graceful and beautiful NOW, even when I may not always feel like I'm any of those things. We can flirt together and be romantic together in ways I was never really comfortable with, with anyone else; maybe that's because he's French and he can pull off "romance" in ways I think most American men can't (sorry, guys).
So when I say that I wish I'd known how to be flirty and be more confident with men when I was younger, it's more about regretting how much time and energy I wasted, trying to twist myself into someone I wasn't.
And if I'm being honest, it would have been nice just to have the EXPERIENCE of what it felt like to be THAT girl... the one that all the boys notice, even if she's not the prettiest in the room, because she exudes that kind of (French) confidence in her femininity and in her sexuality.
So... what about YOU? What do you enjoy about being a girl? What do you wish you were better at?
Thanks to the NY Times and this article, I just splurged BIG time on the most adorable purse EVER.
It's from this Etsy shop, rebounddesigns (also see her web site here), and was hand-made from an actual book cover. Which is quite possibly one of the coolest ideas ever. And WHICH book, you ask, enticed me to plop down the most money I've ever paid for a purse? (I think Georges is probably wincing a little as he reads that last bit. Don't worry, sweetie, it's a lot less than a Louis Vuitton. Or, say, an iPad. And I love you.)
None other than Jane Austen's Sense and Sensibility. Which I just happened to finish re-reading YESTERDAY.
As a writer and a serial Jane Austen fan, how could I NOT buy it? And it was the LAST ONE (na na na-na na!) I consider it destiny: this purse and I were made for each other.
My only regret about buying it is that I will have to wait until May 25th to get my hands on it, as I decided to have it shipped to my mom's house in New Jersey for safety and that's the day I arrive for my next visit back home. I'm considering it a birthday present for myself: I turn 49 on May 19th and I think entering the last year of my 40s warrants such drastic "retail therapy" measures to take the edge off the horror of this reality. And also I recently finished that big ghostwriting job that ended up taking 18 months longer than I'd estimated (mainly my fault, by the way), and hadn't yet come up with a small reward for myself for that. I rarely buy anything frivolous for myself, but I think purses are quickly going to become my new fashion-passion. For one thing, they always fit no matter what you weigh, and here in Paris I have a hard time shopping for clothes or shoes that fit me.
I'm so excited about this purse. I was dead tired this morning, having been up half the night with severe back pain, but suddenly I feel a whole lot better.
I may even want to sleep with this purse when I get it. That's how much I love it already.
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I've selected several of my favorite photos from Paris and around France, and created these adorable clothing and home décor items (and more!) with the help of CafePress.com. Just click to get YOUR Bold Soul-venirs here!
