First things first, since it's the First of January: Happy 2014 to all of you! Our holiday was quiet and full of too much food, but I'm not complaining because it was really excellent food, and we're having the leftovers for lunch today. How was your holiday?
Guess what this post will NOT be about: a huge list of all the wonderful things I am resolved to do in the coming year. I've come to a decision about whether or not to declare any New Year's resolutions or intentions from now on. And you know what? I've decided NOT TO BOTHER. Because (1) who really cares about anyone else's resolve or intention to do anything -- EYES ON YOUR OWN PAPERS!; (2) I probably spend far too much time navel-gazing as it is, so why give myself yet another excuse for over-introspection; and (3) most of us don't keep our resolutions for longer than it takes to light that next cigarette, eat that next Oreo, or blow off that next workout anyway, so who are we kidding about that? At the risk of seeming crass, New Year's resolutions are all pretty much bullshit we tell ourselves and anyone else who is willing to listen. And making and then publishing a list of how we're going to miraculously change ourselves and overhaul the bits of our lives that seem imperfect? Yeah. Nothing to see here. Move along.
That's not to say I don't have goals. That's not to say there aren't things I hope to accomplish in the new year. Everyone needs to have something meaningful to work towards. I think we all can guess what the main one is for me this year: A LOVELY PUBLISHED BOOK! But I'm not worried about that happening because I know without a doubt that it WILL happen, and probably sooner than I imagine, too. So I don't need to waste mental energy "resolving" anything about it; I just have to keep doing what I'm doing, and the "when" will take care of itself.
There are other things I am committed to in my life as well: improving my overall health and longevity is top of that list. (If I were making a list.) (Which I'm not.) But why bore others with the details of what needs to be "fixed" there? Is it even anyone else's business? Not so much. Suffice to say, there are improvements to be made if what I really want is to feel at my best physically, if what I want is to have the drive and energy to live the rest of my life the way I want to. I'm already taking steps that seem to be paying off. For one thing, I appear, through no conscious planning or effort or "resolution" of my own, to have completely given up stress eating over my recent stateside travels and the holidays, and although I have no explanation why or how that happened (and it's a first for me) I am just happy that there seems to have been some sort of long-overdue internal shift occurring here. Why over-analyze it? I have just decided to embrace it and roll with it; coupled with the exercise I started a couple of months ago, this is all good stuff. Here also, I just need to keep moving ahead in that same direction.
So really, what else is there to be "resolved" upon? Maybe part of being in my 50s means I get to relax about all that self-improvement crap, all the worrying that I'm not perfect? If so, then it's the best part of being in my 50s thus far. That, and realizing how much I love drinking Pineau des Charentes when it's cold out.
I want 2014 to be about hitting some big milestones, it's true. But I also want it to be about more peace of mind, and getting there without making myself crazy in the process. I don't think you can plan how to do that. I think you just have to do it, in individual moments.
With that in mind, here's to as many wonderful, individual milestone moments as possible in 2014!