It's been a while since I had any reason to post about my past as a single woman, let alone to THINK about it. Having just passed our 1-year anniversary of meeting and our 3-month wedding anniversary, suffice to say that I have plenty of good things to think about that are happening in my PRESENT, so I'm not putting any energy into dwelling on the past.
Today, though, two things sort of coincided that made me reflect on some of my ex-boyfriends. One was that I've been re-reading every blog post since the beginning, sifting through them for material to include in my book. And I got to this one about one of my exes who had been lurking on the blog. After that post, he got the hint, his cryptic encoded comments ceased, and although for all I know he may still be reading the blog, at least he's not up to his old games in my comments box.
In that same post, I also referred to another ex, one who continued to contact me over the years despite his being married, then married with children, then married with children and professing to have found Jesus (um, yeah, right). Each time, he would claim to still have feelings for me, no matter what was going on in my life and no matter how inappropriate it was for him to voice his feelings. And each time, I would tell him go away, and he would do so, but only for a while, and then years later he'd pop up again out of the blue.
Today was one of those times. He's "popped" again, more than five years after the last time. (I'm hearing the "Jaws" theme music... just when you thought it was safe...) This time, he tried to establish contact via a LinkedIn request where he listed himself as a "friend" of mine.
I couldn't believe my eyes. And all I could think of was: WTF????? IS HE COMPLETELY INSANE? I can't imagine why he'd think we are still friends. I've done everything I could do to make it clear I desire NO contact with him, that there is no earthly purpose in it as far as I'm concerned. Our original relationship lasted no more than three months but here he is, roughly FIFTEEN YEARS LATER, still hanging onto some imaginary thread of a connection between us. Not only is it annoying, it's pathetic.
In re-reading that blog post about ex's who won't stay ex-ed, at the same time as I received this LinkedIn request, it just served to remind me of how glad I am that THAT part of my life is behind me. And how blessed I feel to have a man in my life who never leaves me wondering about how he feels about me, the way my exes did.
I have no idea whether or not this ex-boyfriend reads this blog, or whether (if he doesn't read it) he even knows I'm married. Judging by his past track record and his casual disregard for his own marital status, he might not care if I'm married or not. But it doesn't matter. I simply have no interest in anything he might have to say to me, even if it's the most innocent "Just wanted to say 'Hey'".
And to his request to be Linked-In together? I clicked the button that said: "I don't know this person". Because he certainly doesn't know ME if he thinks I'd be even remotely interested in resurrecting something that was dead long ago.
I only hope it will be the last of him. He's not annoying or scary in a stalker-ish sort of way, luckily. I just have no patience with people who live in the past and don't see the present reality. Which in this case is: "What part of It's Over and Hell No, We Can't Be Friends don't you understand?"