This past autumn, I felt compelled to watch "The Apprentice/Martha Stewart" despite the fact that Martha Stewart irritates the hell out of me (so does Trump, for that matter) because one of my clients, Leslie Sanchez, was a candidate (and made it to the final 6). I am nothing if not loyal.
Now, I am about to be coerced into watching "The Bachelor", starting this Monday evening, because it's being shot in Paris. I will watch as 25 stunning young 20/30-something women try to work their feminine wiles on a 32-yr. old ER doctor. I will watch them stab each other in the back. I will watch the cat-fights and the lying. I will watch the doctor (a DOCTA! Every mother's dream come true - and he's cute to boot) try to figure out who is scamming him and who is being "real".
I will watch as he cuts the group down to size each week (do they still do that stupid "rose ceremony" thing? I haven't watched it since Trista and Ryan) and be disgusted if he picks the shallow, brainless blond goddess with zero personality and DD boobs over the brainy brunette or the smart-ass redhead. I will, despite all my efforts not to care, end up rooting for some poor girl who probably won't make it to the final four contestants. And when he finally proposes to the "girl of his dreams" I will not believe they will make it to the alter in the long run, because percentage-wise most of the couples on past "Bachelor/Bachelorette" shows didn't make it past the post-finale press conference.
I will do all of these idiotic things and give my attention to yet another lame reality TV show, not because I am an incurable romantic but because it is in PARIS, and I am starved for any glimpse of the city I love most in the world. My heart will leap... not because Dr. Travis has a liplock on some leggy orthodontist or flight attendant from Memphis, but because while he's doing that, he will be standing on the Pont des Arts, my favorite bridge with my favorite view of the Ile St. Louis. I will sigh with longing, wishing I was one of those young women, not because they ARE young(er) and with a gawgeous docta, but because they get to spend time in the the most romantic place on earth - win, lose or draw.
My love affair is with Paris. "The Bachelor" is just a way for me to reconnect with the love of my life, just a bit, until I can be reunited more permanently. So I am willing to suffer the voyeurism, the editing for dramatic effect, and whatever else this bunch of attention-seeking women is going to dish out.
As I said, I'm nothing if not loyal.